Pop Rocks

When Paige was about 2-3 I thought I would let her try Pop Rocks - here's how it went over:

Pop Rocks

Flashback #4 Things I Think I Hear

3 year olds don't always speak clearly, and on any given morning before I've had my coffee, or during a mad rush to get out the door - certain things can be misheard and cause a bit of an uproar.

For instance, one afternoon while we are getting ready to take the trip back to daddy's, Paige is happily occupied with animal crackers at the kitchen table while I proceed to run around franticly looking for some misplaced shoe.

Shoes found and finally on feet, Paige hold up a cracker (can they really be called crackers? They taste like cookies to me! Ok sorry, ADD kicked in) and tells me she's like to give it to daddy. Fine, I say to her but I ask her to stick it in her pocket so it doesn't get lost, broken or befall some other fate worthy of a tiny camel cookie.

Now Paige is walking in front of me, partially out into the yard, and she says back to me with out turning around

"No, if I stick it in my pocket it will get all fucked up"

I stop dead in my tracks. What did she just say? "Paige hunny repeat that please"

"I don't want to put it in my pocket because it will get all fucked up"

I'm scanning my recent memory now wondering, did I stub my toe and let the F-Bomb slip? Where did she hear that?

I walk up behind her, as she reaches the car, spin her around and look her in the eyes.

"Paige, please say that one more time. A little slower."

This annoyed look, I must admit she gets from me, appears on her face and a "Uh!" comes out before hand but eventually she spits it out, very annoyed like:

"Mom! I said that I don't want to put it in my pocket because it will get all fuzzed up, from the fuzz (points to pocket) thats in my pocket! Geeze"

PHEW!

I seriously needed a hearing aid that day. And let me tell you, trying not to burst out laughing, while being shocked into a coma - isn't as easy as you might think. You can be the most straight laced person and a toddler whipping out the "F-enheimer" will make you shoot your tea out your nose!

Flash Back #3 "With The Best of Intention"

June 2007, Paige was 3 years old.

Alex and I took Paige to Majors in Vadnais Heights for dinner. We make it through the whole meal with no out bursts or need to get up and run around the table in circles...which has been known to happen.

As usual, I ate WAY too much food. I began to notice I might need some new pants this year as I was quite certain I was going to pop right out of the capri khakis I was wearing due to the "pasta massacre" I just threw down on my main course. Oh, that poor button....hanging on for dear life...

Anyone who knows me, knows I'm not fat, I've just always weighed 100 lbs my whole life. So at 27, lingering around the "normal and healthy" weight for my height finally, and being a little out of shape, I felt like a blob sometimes. And any parent knows when you have kids, you spend every penny on your kids clothing, and not much on your own.

Well I commented on this to Alex.

"Babe, I think I'm going to need some new pants this year, these ones are about to quit on me" I pointed at my tummy and made a fat face which Paige thought was hysterical.

Before he could respond our waitress appeared with my leftovers box - you know us over eaters, leave no good noodle behind. She asked if we wanted any desert, to which I replied "Oh no, I haven't any room"

And sweet little Paige tossed in her thoughts by saying....

"Yay - My mom's FAT!" in that 3 year old, "outdoor voice". The whole restaurant heard her, and looked over.

Lesson Learned: Don't talk about anything in front of Paige you don't want the entire room your int o know about!

Flashback #2: The Baby Powder Incident

When your daughter is being quite in her room, during nap time, when she normally wouldn't be - never think that she's just turned over a new leaf and decided that she's going straight to bed...

Oh yea, and don't leave the baby powder in her room either...

(FYI - that shirt was dark brown!)



This happened May 2007 - shortly after her 3rd birthday party - as that shirt was a gift from her friend Nina. Took awhile to get it clean, so she could wear it again!

Flashback #1 "The Amazing Paige"

Every now and again I will post a little story, a flash back if you will, of something Paige has said or done. It seems with age, her antics get funnier and funnier and it would be a shame not to recap the past 4 years..

With that, I give you "The Amazing Paige"

When Paige was just about three, she was sleeping in a toddler bed. As much of a big girl as it made her feel, it was pure hell for me for awhile having to remind her not to get out of bed several times a night. After a while, my simply opening the door would do the trick and she would lay down...for a while.

One evening in particular I had been having an especially tough time with her. Having to go up to her room 4 times already, on this, the 5th trip I was pretty annoyed.

I swung open her door and found her bedding tossed about, stuffed animals discarded and no Paige.

I thought quickly, had I heard her walking around? No. With the hardwood floor in our house and her bedroom directly above where I was in the basement, had she opened her door or left her room I would know.

Suddenly, once i realized she couldn't have left her room panic rushed over me and I felt like I was living in one of those Lifetime Original Movies about kidnapped children.

I went to the closet, looked under the bed, when I heard a giggle, followed by "I'm hiding Mommy"

Okay. Have you seen Poltergeist? Where the little girl talks through the TV to her mom...what was going on in her room was a little like that.

I looked in the direction of her voice, which was coming straight from her bed. Nothing was on her bed but a pillow, and I really started to believe I was losing my mind. Was I hearing things?

Then I saw the pillow move. And a little toe poked out the bottom of it. And I realized Paige was INSIDE the pillow case, sitting at the head of her bed, pretending to actually be her pillow!!! I didn't even know a child could FIT in a standard sized pillow case.

I yanked it off her head, told her to go back to sleep, made the bed back up then got out of there as fast as I could because I was on the verge of laughing uncontrollably. Half out of relief and half because....she actually climbed inside the pillow case to hide from me! Who does that?

SHe may have a good chance of becoming a magician someday.